RandomNPC – Video Game RPG Reviews, Editorials, and Features

9 Photos

Source: Famitsu

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Source: Game Watch

It has been rightly said that every book written represents the death of a perfect idea. This principle can easily be applied to video games, and perhaps none embody this like the obscure Russian first-person survival game Pathologic. With a haphazard English localization, a dated engine and very unforgiving gameplay, Pathologic lacks even the cult status to be salvaged from the bargain bin. The tragedy in this is that the game deserves a look by anyone who ever claimed to support the idea of video games as art, for few other games to date have been as bold, uncompromising and mature. (more…)

At long last, I return! My PC is, somehow, back in working order and I get back to talking about stuff you have all probably talked to death: some noteworthy titles due out in the months and years to come. Observe! Or, listen actually. (more…)

Greetings, people. No time for small talk this week, I’m just here to get in, whack the guy whom I set up with a fake date through the internet because he refused to pay Brucie his money who in turn proposed to me this ridiculously circuitous plan for revenge, and get out. Now, let’s get down to brass tacks. (more…)

Ports are very often a point of contention among fans. An inferior port can leave would-be fans in the cold when it arrives on another platform, while one that’s clearly better or has a ton of extra features can earn the scorn of its established base. They can be resource intensive, requiring considerable recoding to transfer from one set of hardware to another, or to reconfigure controls. They’re risky, too – expensive gambles that the gaming public liked the game enough, or heard enough positive press the first time, that they’d be willing to buy it en masse again. To this atmosphere we have Mass Effect for the PC, a surprisingly positive example of how porting can improve the final product without changing the core experience. (more…)

Hello, good chums and chumettes.  Another week has come and gone, and once again we try to forstall the inevitable return to work with an edition of Current Quests.  So what are we all up to this week?  Let me break it down for you.

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Hello hello, folks. Back again with another NPCast, and this time we’re talking about something near and dear to the hearts of millions. Just a few feet away in the back of the car they’re driving, actually. How can this magical mystery burn-liquid have an impact on escapist male power fantasies and puzzle-oriented dating sims involving catgirls? Mankind may never know. Not that this stops me from opining on the subject, of course.
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I am John Boske, and I want to ask you all a question. Is a man not entitled to the exclusive on his PC? (more…)

Rarely one to package a game just once, Square-Enix has launched a site to announce the upcoming release of Dragon Quest IV for the Nintendo DS.  Last seen in North America as Dragon Warrior IV for the NES, way back in 1992, Dragon Quest IV has been confirmed with a release date of September 16 of this year.  Further releases are planned for Dragon Quest V and VI, though there is currently no further information about their release dates.

Tidings, folks. We’re back with another installment of “That Thing We Do Every Sunday”. Prepare to be astounded and amazed as no less than five – count ’em, five! – staffers have fallen under the insidious snare of Persona 3: FES. Not me, however… not yet, although I confess it did look tempting as I passed by at the store. More on that later.

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Note to self: The unofficial Tales of Symphonia drinking game you read about on the internets is not to be played by the faint of stomach.  Taking a shot every time somebody has an aside and then says “…oh, nothing,” when somebody asks them about it basically means you might as well just start drinking as soon as you start the game.  Believe me, it’ll catch up.

In any case, the title sums up this cast’s content; ‘the Topic of’ added to respectfully differentiate this from the surprisingly good On Writing by Stephen King.  Yes, that Stephen King.  Also, the Metal Wolf Chaos plug can adequately be explained by watching this documentary of the American electoral process.
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Hi, everybody!  Just a quick lil’ update since I’m kind of buzzed after returning from a friend’s wedding and I’m sort of getting to this at the last minute, but that’s okay.  Everybody gather ’round and let’s take a look at what our beloved staffers are up to this week! (more…)

Too often in western RPGs is ‘choice’ touted as a feature, either through customization of the main character or through the impact your decisions have on the game’s story.  Almost as often that latter choice turns out to be hollow, picking between saving the village or burning it down and dancing a jig on peasant corpses.  But sometimes you have a game that wields this correctly.  Enter The Witcher, in which your decisions, and the consequences thereof, are one of the game’s strongest aspects.  The rest, sadly, is just decent enough to stay out of the plot’s way. (more…)

It has come to my attention that a rogue piece of software is being proliferated with the intent to undermine the efforts of the United Nations Anti-Terrorist Coalition (UNATCO) and FEMA agents across the country, if not the world. This software, codenamed “Deus Ex,” contains the standard terrorist propaganda bullet points, depicting the United States government as terrorists and UNATCO peacekeepers as an occupying army. It claims to be a work of fiction, and takes the form of what could fairly be called a training simulator, thus posing a more signifcant threat than typical terrorist propaganda efforts. And so, I have decided to address this latest meme directly. (more…)

For years I have bided my time, watching as a titan amongst games slowly faded from the pages of history; criminally subdued and doomed to obscurity in the face of flash-in-the-pan shooters and imbecilic role-playing games. Today one could point to this former behemoth, only to be met with confusion – “What was that?” the children will ask, “What was that?”

And yet, from the shadows, I knew the truth, as did many others. For every whisper of the game’s name, someone else who knew of its greatness was reminded to reinstall it. Its very dialogue has become code, its many quotes an identifying phrase as secretive as the societies upon which its epic story rests. Though contemporary titles struggle mightily to bury its existence, they can only stand in awe of its legacy.

And so it is that I infiltrated local gaming communities, testing, probing, searching for the right opportunity to plant my feet and alter the course of this unending stream of mediocrity. Working from within, I subtly guided the mechanics of this site, coercing and twisting as necessary, and at long last shall my plan come to fruition.

Let none doubt from this day forward that RandomNPC shall thus be dedicated to the reigning champion of games, the masterpiece to end all masterpieces, and the pinnacle of human civilization. Yes, greater than sliced bread, the cotton gin, and porn on the internet.

From this day forward, let us rejoice in our own God by Machine.

All hail Deus Ex!

So in between beating up insane hobos in Condemned 2 and watching countless variants of Caramelldansen, I managed to finish up Mass Effect.  I felt inspired (read: contractually obligated) to give my two cents in parallel to Cortney’s review of same.  After attempting feebly to review the whole thing in a faux-foppish English gentleman’s voice, I gave up and went off into some tangent on how games should and should not start.  Mass Effect provides an interesting case study of the latter.  Observe!
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Welcome back people, for yet another addition of “Is it Sunday Already?”  A quick sampling of our gaming appetites at the moment; you may notice more than one person is itching for their Smash Brothers fix, and at least one person wants to kill them for it.  Observe! (more…)

And so it begins, our first genuine foray into podcasting.  Just a short piece on what we’re doing here out on the cold, cruel internets, and sorta-true observations of the media which are dedicated to covering our pasttime.  Sit back, relax, and try to imagine how people ever got old DOS games working.  Seriously, it will boggle the mind, even the minds of people who lived through that era.
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Good news, our loyal readers! Due to popular request, and because it sounded like a good idea at the time, we are going live with podcasts. Now you won’t just see us, you’ll hear us, too! Well… okay, you couldn’t see us before. At least, I hope you couldn’t, because that would be very off-putting. Ahem. Anyway, we’re just testing the system for uploading these things, we’ll have a meatier introduction piece soon. In the meantime, sit back, relax, and try not to think about more productive things you could be doing than listening to me telling you to buy Deus Ex.

Like, for instance, buying Deus Ex ^^b
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