RandomNPC – Video Game RPG Reviews, Editorials, and Features

Hi, everybody!  Just a quick lil’ update since I’m kind of buzzed after returning from a friend’s wedding and I’m sort of getting to this at the last minute, but that’s okay.  Everybody gather ’round and let’s take a look at what our beloved staffers are up to this week!

Michael “Slayer of God” Kozinko’s been up to no good, starting to make trouble in my neighborhood.  But besides that he’s finishing up Digital Devil Saga 2 and collecting Pseudodroid medals in Mega Man: ZX Advent.  I lost track of him for now, but after I moved in with… y’know what?  I don’t have the heart for a Bel-Air at the moment.  No, too much effort.  I’m just going to end on a Rickroll and be done with it.

Cortney “Alethea” Stone continues her epic struggle against Wild Arms: XF, prying her way past yet another hideously hard fight and breezing through a few more  that, reportedly, are far easier.  She was last seen seconds ago after she got up from a successful pouncetackle and slinked back into the shadows, presumably preparing for another strike.  Which reminds me, somebody re-locate my shoulder, will you?

Michael “CactuarJoe” Beckett’s been up to some Final Fantasy VII: Crisis Core.  He’s just finishing up, expect his review shortly.  The brother from another planet’s also waiting on Persona 3: FES, and I keep typing that as Personal for some reason.  I just did it again, it’s really irritating.  Sadly I have no specific jest to make at his expense, and so I move on to…

…Jordan “J_Sensei” Jackson, who’s also digging through Crisis Core, albeit at a greatly reduced pace compared to our resident Thousand Needles expert.  He also picked up a beta key for Metal Gear Online, and is eagerly anticipating the chance to paralyze some poor bastard with a perfectly-timed crotch grab.  Remember: if it’s good enough for the president, it’s good enough for you!

Derek “Roku” Cavin, when not ruling the place with an iron fist and making dictatorial decisions about how we democratically select our upcoming site design, has been playing him some Mana Khemia.  He was last seen playing Tetris, futilely stacking those crazy Z-shaped blocks while holding out for a long, flat one.  Oh, Roku, don’t you know those blocks never come until after you need them?

Jerry “XeroZohar” Swain’s been up to some Assassin’s Creedence Clearwater Revival, blending middle-ages assassinry (I make up words as necessary!) with Rock Band goodness.  Wait, is CCR even in Rock Band?  I don’t remember, Xero just used the nick one time, sort of.  Anyway, he’s also dallying with Final Fantasy I and/or II.

T.J. “Nerdboy himself” Condon, in between marathon FFXI sessions and the occasional margarita drinking contest with the autopilot, has been up to Mana Khemia, which he recently deigned to review.  At last report he’s “slogging through reality in the meantime,” waiting for the day when his repeated encounters with manticores in a post-nuclear world will come in handy.

As for me, I’m making the most of my time by replaying stuff for no reason other than it’s awesome.  Final Fantasy XII and my beloved S.T.A.L.K.E.R. are sharing my attention at the moment, though I’ve got one eye on the upcoming PC release of Mass Effect.  All this while daydreaming about a fanfic scene for .Hack starring an original character and set to Otis Redding’s “Dock of the Bay”.  You laugh, and that’s fine… but I could make it awesome, and deep down inside, I think you agree.

Or maybe not, what do I know?  I thought it was perfectly okay to yell from the back of the church that the groom owed me five bucks from Thursday, before remembering that it was from a year ago and he paid me back the next day.  Oh well.

Anyway, that’s it for us, boys and girls.  See you next update!