RandomNPC – Video Game RPG Reviews, Editorials, and Features

Hello, good chums and chumettes.  Another week has come and gone, and once again we try to forstall the inevitable return to work with an edition of Current Quests.  So what are we all up to this week?  Let me break it down for you.

The Persona 3: FES group therapy love-a-thon is winding down as both Michael “CactuarJoe” Beckett and T.J. “Nerdboy” Condon have finished the game, along with its legendary extras.  Nerdboy wandered off in a shell-shocked daze, muttering something about lamb kabobs, while Cactuar stayed conscious long enough to reveal his final playtime in FES clocked in at a bone-crushing 130 hours.  He contents himself now with talk of kittens and picking at yarn balls.

One leaves and another enters; internet dance sensation Metal Gear Solid 4 has caught the eye of both Jordan “J_Sensei” Jackson and Michael “Slayer of God” Kozinko, who both plan to seize and consume it on launch day.  Teacher’s been busy elsewhere with Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones and Lego Indiana Jones, while Slayer’s dallying with FES’s extra content, alongside the Final Fantasy Tactics redux for the PSP.

Jerry “XeroZohar” Swain’s been treading on his old stomping grounds in Metroid Prime 3 on hard mode, while the oft-mentioned FES lingers in the background, neglected and resentful.  Persona 3 was last seen carving a big ‘x’ in the mirror and muttering something along the lines of “if I can’t have him, no game can.”  We’ve dispatched Precrime to look into the matter.

Erika “Wolfraven” Lachapelle has been busying herself with Suikoden V, yet another game I keep saying I’ll get around to someday when I’m independently wealthy and can just sit around playing games all day.  The 108 stars of destiny demand to be found, which is why she persists despite a punishingly high encounter rate.  On break, she’s been taking FIre Emblem: The Sacred Stones out for a spin.

Cortney “Alethea” Stone has been manning the crow’s nest, scanning the horizon for something else to review.  Her sights are currently set on the Penny Arcade game On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness: Episode One, which snubbed #1 NFL draft pick from 1998 Final Fantasy VII for a replay.  Said Final Fantasy VII in reply: #*@&!^#@!  A succinct reply, to be sure.

Token minority Derek “Roku” Cavin, in between the major business calisthenics necessary to keep our corporate machine running smoothly, has been playing a little bit of Chaos Wars.  When he’s not doing that, he’s looking forward to summer so he can stop talking about games and get back to playing them more often.  As have/are we all, Rokkun.  As have/are we all.

As for me, I’m running Mass Effect on the PC and 360 for some side-by-side comparisons; expect an article forthcoming, possibly with amusing screenshots and a scandalous reveal of over a gigabyte of Devo.  Of course I’m still rocking some Deus Ex, but I’ve also dipped my toes into a strange and surprisingly faithful recreation of the old Mac FPS Pathways into Darkness, via a Doom 3 mod.  I’d pay $texas for a proper remake, but this is pretty cool so far.

That’s it for us, folks!  Have a good week, and remember: you do not mess with the Imperial Watch.